The Anxiety Wellbeing Coach
About me
anxiety_wellbeing
the_anxiety_wellbeing.coach
About me
Hello, a bit about me. My name is Emma this is me on the left. My passion and work is as an anxiety wellbeing coach. I founded anxiety wellbeing in January of 2018, although the idea came long before that. In my early twenty’s I experienced, high panic every 30 mins, fear of going out, seeing people, talking, breathing, thinking, you name it I was permanently scared to be, had nowhere I could be my old self. I got out of the fear circle without the help of medication, I was afraid of them too. What it does mean though is that I was forced to learn about the causes then, and not at the point of trying to get off of meds. What I can tell you now is that anxiety is normal, if we are experiencing it, there is a reason, our bodies and minds are reacting in this way. It’s up to us to look for the why’s and understand, what’s been happening?
Anxiety Wellbeing is about helping you to understand more about what is anxiety, the mechanics of what is happening inside you, the real causes, and ways to self manage those causes so that you are not afraid, in control, and actioning solutions, not living your life like “I am anxious therefore I can’t” so that you can focus on the things you really want to achieve in your life.
I noticed very quickly one cause of anxiety on social media, there were only images with quotes for example “think positive” and I would say out loud, “yes but your’e not telling people how, or what thinking negatively is, I found people were becoming worried and scared about the subject, “have I got it?” “ I’m not thinking positively, what’s wrong with me?” I found the problem to be a bit similar to when the news really went on about terrorism in the 2000’s, remember that? When all you could think about was, what if it could happen to you, well did it happen to you? Prob not, you’ve got more chance of being run over by a bus, but the news going on and on about, maybe?!? There’s a chance! Beware! Be afraid, blooming code reds helped you to THINK it might and that was enough.
The thing is, with anxiety, fear causes anxiety, and while speaking about and being honest about your struggles is the first step to help yourself getting some help, if you are exposed to lots of only the words ‘mental health’, worry about it, statistics of the worst case scenario, quotes of how people feel etc, perceive anxiety to be a dark evil cloud and no real information, this will cause fear and cause anxiety.
We need understanding of why you may feel anxious or panicky, because you end up believing it’s something to be scared of and that you are broken, no solutions or self compassion, it also means it’s more that likely you will experience anxiety, because fear is one of the main ingredients to the human stress response, anxiety. Also an anxiety symptom is being focused on potential danger, so we end up focused on “What if i get anxiety? What if I get a mental health problem? “ causing fear causing anxiety. Do you see where this is going?
Treat the symptoms
Look for the real causes
Action solutions for future prevention
End the negative cycle
Start a new thriving one
Practical Experience
My practical anxiety healing journey was firstly confiding in a doctor, & speaking honestly about what I was going through. I had been experiencing panic every 30 minutes, and fear of everything. It may help you to read my story. Click above
I was scared to go out, then leave my room, then be with myself, as you can imagine this had a huge effect on my life. I was also actively avoiding telling anyone or seeking help because I believed I was going crazy and was worried the doctor would tell me had to be sectioned.
After suffering for 6 months I finally faced the fear and spoke with the doctor. I have to say I felt better talking to someone about it and had a good cry, it was a release I needed. To my relief, he said I was experiencing anxiety and panic and offered medication, which I was too scared to take and he referred me to a CBT Therapist. I was glad he had not decided I was crazy, but I was still afraid if he was wrong and that there was something more. Now I know that was only fear talking.
I had about 12 CBT sessions. Here I learned helpful ways to calm the body & mind, something I believed at the time was never going to be possible again. Also in those sessions, I learned a few Cognitive Behavioural Therapy tools & how to implement them into my life to help me navigate fearful thoughts and negative coping mechanisms I had learnt that weren’t helping me. They were actually causing me anxiety & blocking any life progress. It was!
CBT sessions were the start to reducing fear, but did not give me everything I needed. I did not know it at the time but also needed to learn how to exit the circles of fear that I was in, like how to get outside again, how to get back my life, how to get my head around what I was actually afraid of without panicking and wanting to run away. There was something missing…..
What was missing was, I did not understand why I was afraid, and what I was afraid of accept that I was afraid of panic, but why was everything else so debilitating?
I have discovered through my own journey of understanding and trial and error exiting my own cycles of anxiety and panic, and there were many, that I also needed to be aware of exactly what I was afraid of in order to exit. You cannot face what you are unaware of. I began a journey of identifying what I was afraid of really.
I found and find that if you did not know what you are afraid of, you can’t face it and still feel stuck. Many people I work with have been going around in circles for years.
Then
Over the years my own tools and CBT ones combined helped me again and again through tough life moments, such as bereavement of my parents, going through a separation, moving to a new country & enabled me to navigate towards my life goals. They have always been a helpful anchor.
I took a life long path to understanding all fears and causes of anxiety, gaining more and more insight about what the human body and mind needs and how it functions.
This enabled me to really understand, why my mind and body was doing that?! Or more accurately, what was I reacting to and why?
This holistic view enables us to understand what the body is reacting to & therefore finding the real problem, which is the REAL causes of anxiety. In order to prevent panic & know how to give your body what it needs when anxious, rather than focus on anxiety and only treat the symptoms. There is no long term solution or prevention in that.
The problem is not the human stress response anxiety or the human. The problem is the causes.
Theoretical Study
In 2015, after a funny conversation with my mum on the telephone, I decided I wanted to get a greater understanding of the CBT Practices and Principles, to be better able to teach them and improve my coaching skills. The conversation was funny because, I brought up the fact that I was still waiting for my hormones to regulate themselves after having my second son, and with the lack of regular sleep and the unpredictability of a new-born plus a toddler etc. etc. I was experiencing anxiety. No that’s not funny, but my mum’s reaction made me giggle, she didn’t get it, even when I brought up my panic experiences from the past she didn’t even remember me going through panic and agoraphobia, & I lived with her then. I thought either I was amazing at hiding it or she thought I was being a late teenager. It reminded me of how much I had learnt and understood, how much that practical info would help others get out of the same situation today and that also, other people can’t automatically tell what that you’re feeling or going through.
This thought gave me the push I needed to begin the study of Modern Applied Psychology, something I had always wanted to do. Plus I have regularly found that my own experiences have helped other people navigate theirs too, and that naturally, people feel comfortable to come to me to talk and for help and guidance.
In 2018 after 2 years of study with Achology The Academy of Modern Applied Psychology, plus The Transformation Academy I became an accredited CBT Practitioner, I started the daily anxiety management account on Instagram @anxiety_wellbeing and began coaching and guiding others through and out of the anxiety experience, thinking better, feeling better and focused on their true life goals & passions. The goal is to be thriving and not just surviving.
I plan to never stop learning & gaining insight. That is my passion.
Medication?
I did get out of the anxiety, panic circle, that I had been in for 6 months & I did it without the help of medication. Doesn’t make me a hero, it means that,
I was just as afraid of medication as I was panic.
I did the work I needed to on myself asap, rather than start medication unaware that there was nothing wrong with me, that my needs had been unmet, that anxiety was a response to the real problem. I learned that I could calm, that I wasn’t going crazy and that, feeling like that was a symptom that I could work on. I was in need of some practical tips.
I find that people trying to exit medication are afraid of coming off (which is normal) but that fear fuels anxiety and is enough for you to think ‘ I can’t do it’ and I‘ll never get off meds’, because the issues that caused anxiety are often still there and thinking you are not able suggests to yourself that you are broken and unable. Coupled with side effects from coming off and this fearful thinking style causes more anxiety.
You’re not broken, you are in need of learning how! Find out more now.